In this excerpt from the chapter on the Fifteenfold Rising, from the book Kashmir Shaivism - The Secret Supreme, Swami Lakshmanjoo explains the deeper meaning of mantra as manana and trāṇa, and describes the experience of ahaṁ-ahaṁ, idaṁ-idaṁ in the state of śuddhavidyā. He also explains why this state of the yogin is not yet stable and may come and go.
We studied this teaching during Weekly Sangha #33. To explore the subject in more depth, you can watch the full Sangha replay here: https://www.lakshmanjooacademy.org/free-weekly-sangha.
JOHN: So, what does “mantra” mean then – “mantra”?
SWAMIJI: Manana and trāṇa (manana means, awareness; trāṇa means, protection from all sides).
JOHN: So it’s not like a mantra, a word.
SWAMIJI: No . . . it is the real mantra.
JOHN: Manana and . . .
SWAMIJI: . . . trāṇa.
Manana means, knowing from all sides.
Trāṇa means, protecting the whole ignorant world; protecting the whole ignorant world from ignorance.
Hence this state is the real state of Śiva, though it is not a stable state.
And in this state, the mantra is “ahaṁ-ahaṁ, idaṁ-idaṁ.”
JOHN: “Ahaṁ-ahaṁ”, we are using mantra in a different sense now?
SWAMIJI: Yes.
“ ‘Ahaṁ-ahaṁ’ – I am the reality of the whole universe, i.e., I am the truth of the universe; and ‘idaṁ-idaṁ’ – this universe is false, unreal.”
This is what he feels in this śuddhavidyā state.
JOHN: Now, what is that, “always being aware with action”, what does that mean, “always being aware with action”?
SWAMIJI: Because in this state you are sometimes aware and not active, sometimes active and not aware.
JOHN: Like in a samādhi, having the awareness but duringbeing in a trance.
SWAMIJI: Yes.
JOHN: Like right now we’d be aware. I see, I see.
So this ccanould only be in the state of meditation.
SWAMIJI: Meditation, yes . . . this is the state of yogins.
JOHN: That is why that is. And’s why . . . yes. And this is a lived-state, something in the world.
But you said here it is not a stable state; does that mean that sometimes heit comes and goes?
SWAMIJI: Sometimes ithe does not remain in the state for all.
JOHN: Not all of the time?
SWAMIJI: Not all of the time.
JOHN: But much of the time?
SWAMIJI: Much of the time.
Source: Chapter Eight, Kashmir Shaivism - The Secret Supreme,
revealed by Swami Lakshmanjoo
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