Swami Lakshmanjoo was very fond of Sacred Hymns of Utpaladeva’s Shivastotravali, especially the verses below, and often requested his devotees to sing these.
You can listen to Swamiji and devotees chanting the 13th Chapter here. The complete audio/transcription of the Hymns to Shiva, Songs of Devotion in Kashmir Shaivism, Utpaladeva’s Shivastotravali is available with free downloadable audio.
Below is an excerpt from the 13th Chapter (verse 1-4) revealed by Swamiji…
“He who is attached to God, he is beautiful because there is love for God. Love for God is charming.” ~Swami Lakshmanjoo
In Summary . . .
Saṅgrahastotranāma trayodaśaṁ stotram
SWAMIJI: Saṅgrahastotranāma trayodaśaṁ stotram.
These ślokas he has composed when he was in [his] senses. These [previous] ślokas were composed by him when he was gone.
JOHN: The rest of these ślokas in this book are when he was sane?
SWAMIJI: No, this, only the 13th chapter and 14th chapter. He was in his senses. Here [i.e., other chapters], he was not in senses.
Chapter 13 (00:29)
मां प्रति स्थितमिदं शृणु प्रभो ।
सौख्यमेष भवता समागमः
स्वामिना विरह एव दुःखिता ॥१॥
māṁ prati sthitamidaṁ śṛṇu prabho /
saukhyameṣa bhavatā samāgamaḥ
svāminā viraha eva duḥkhitā //1//
Prabho, O Lord, in brief words, I will give you the definition of my pain and pleasure.
Just the meeting of Thee, just to meet You, is pleasure for me. Just to be away from You is pain for me. In brief words, it is the definition of pain and pleasure for me.
In brief words (saṅgraheṇa means in brief words), sukhaduḥkhalakṣaṇam, the definition of pain and pleasure for me, māṁ prati sthitam, for me, please hear, please note, that this is the definition of pain and pleasure for me.
And that definition [of my pleasure] is saukhyameṣa bhavatā samāgamaḥ, just to meet You, Thy meeting is pleasure for me and svāminā viraha eva, and being carried away from Thy presence is pain for me.
Chapter 13 (01:54)
या त्वदप्रथनकालिकास्ति मे ।
तामपीश परिमृज्य सर्वतः
स्वं स्वरूपममलं प्रकाशय ॥२॥
yā tvadaprathanakālikāsti me /
tāmapīśa parimṛjya sarvataḥ
svaṁ svarūpamamalaṁ prakāśaya //2//
Īśa, O Lord, antarapi atitarāmaṇīyasī yā tvad aprathana kālikāsti me, I have that impurity in my mind, by which impurity, tvad aprathana kālikā; tvad aprathana, You are not appearing to me. I can’t perceive You by that impurity of mine.
SCHOLAR: Kālikā is . . .
SWAMIJI: Kālikā means blackness.
SCHOLAR: [For example], in gold, some kālikā is there, some impurity.
SWAMIJI: Impurity, yes. Kālikā means blackness (malinatā, dirt).
And that dirt is residing in my internal state of mind. The outside states of my mind are quite clear, quite pure, but inside there is some dirt in my mind.
SWAMIJI: Minute. Aṇīyasī means minute.
SWAMIJI: Atitarām, very minute and [existing] internally. That is āṇavamala. That is . . .
SCHOLAR: Māyīyamala he has got rid of.
SWAMIJI: Māyīyamala, I have got rid of māyīyamala, and I have got rid of kārmamala. But there is inside that impurity, which is aprathana kālikā, which disturbs me by keeping away Your perception.
SCHOLAR: Because he can’t rest completely in Śiva bhāva. Is that right?
SCHOLAR: Because there is always some āṇavamala.
SWAMIJI: O Lord Śiva, tvamapi parimṛjya sarvataḥ, please remove that impurity also from all sides in my mind. And svaṁ svarūpaṁ amalam, and let Your pure form, pure presence, be revealed to me.
Chapter 13 (04:32)
तावके वपुषि विश्वनिर्भरे
चित्सुधारसमये निरत्यये ।
तिष्ठतः सततमर्चतः प्रभुं
जीवितं मृतमथान्यदस्तु मे ॥३॥
tāvake vapuṣi viśvanirbhare
citsudhārasamaye niratyaye /
tiṣṭhataḥ satatamarcataḥ prabhuṁ
jīvitaṁ mṛtamathānyadastu me //3//
O Lord, there is one desire in me, there is one longing in me. That is, tāvake vapuṣi viśvanirbhare citsudhārasamaye niratyaye, Thy body, which is viśvanirbhare, filled with universal consciousness, citsudhārasa maye, filled with the nectar of God consciousness, and everlasting (niratyaye, everlasting, niratyaye), where there is no end (atyaya means “unending”), unending state of Your body, which is filled with universal consciousness and also filled with absolute God consciousness . . .
SCHOLAR: So, cit, here, means transcendental consciousness.
SWAMIJI: Transcendental consciousness.
. . . I would like to reside in That body of Yours (tiṣṭhataḥ). I don’t want to reside in That body just to relax. No. Let me be in exhaustion there. I have to work there. And that work is satatamarcatā, I want to worship You day and night without any rest. This is my desire, bas.
Jīvitam, let me have life then afterwards. Let me live in this universe [or] mṛtaṁ, let me die in this universe, [or] let me have this liberation from repeated births and deaths. I have not thought about it. Let me die, that is alright. If I die, that is alright. If I live, that is alright. Let me live afterwards if I do this kind of exertion, i.e., exerting myself in worshiping You constantly.
Who? Whom [am I] worshiping? You who are filled with universal consciousness and You who are filled with the nectar of transcendental bliss (both universal consciousness and transcendental bliss).
And That body, I would like to remain in That body, live in That body, reside in That body, and just to worship You. I would like to worship You constantly!
Afterwards, when I do this, when I have this kind of position, let me then live in the universe [or] let me not live in this universe; let me die, let me go to hell, let me go to heaven, let me go to mokṣa dhāma–I don’t care. Bas, there must only be this worship [of You].
Chapter 13 (07:53)
पण्दितोऽस्मि सुभगोऽस्मि कोऽपरः ।
मत्समोऽस्ति जगतीति शोभते
मानिता त्वदनुरागिणः परम् ॥४॥
paṇdito’smi subhago’smi ko’paraḥ /
matsamo’sti jagatīti śobhate
mānitā tvadanurāgiṇaḥ param //4//
“I am the Lord.” “I am beautiful.” “I am charming.” “I am learned.” “I am a scholar.” “Subhaga asmi, I am liked by everybody.” “Who else is parallel to me in this world?” This kind of mānitā, this kind of ego, in the real sense, shines and is appropriate in those who have got love for Thee, bas.
Those who love You, if they say, “I am Īśvara, I am the Lord myself”, “I am charming”, “I am handsome”, and “I am liked by everybody”, “there is no other person equal to me in this world”–this is ego–this kind of ego is appropriate, shines beautifully, in those who have got Your attachment.
[For those] who are detached from You, if they will say, “I am the Lord”, let them go to the dogs. [If he] will say, “I am beautiful”, [actually] he is not beautiful, he is ugly. If he has make-up and everything, still he is ugly. And that person who has got Your devotion, and he is not beautiful, he is ugly, still he is beautiful. He is beautiful. Everything is beautiful in him. Tvat anurāgiṇaḥ, those who have got love for Thee, paraṁ śobhate, this shines only in them.
[He] who is attached to God, he is beautiful because there is love for God. Love for God is charming.
Source: Hymns to Shiva, Songs of Devotion in Kashmir Shaivism,
Utpaladeva’s Shivastotravali revealed by Swami Lakshmanjoo
Copyright © John Hughes